Flip the coin....In this equation I also learned to use food as medication for pain, sadness, fear, and frustration. This..... I do not love. For years food has been my drug of choice, probably longer than I am even aware. This is something I am trying to change. I am trying to build a healthier attitude toward food and its role in my life. As an example last week I got home from a day out in the field and due to a few different things I was very frustrated...I was in the door 5 mins and I had consumed 2 packages of fruit snacks (we had bought for the grandkids who are coming), some goldfish and one other thing I cannot even remember. It was mindless! I pretty quickly was aware of what I had done and was not happy. I knew the only reason I add those things was because I was so frustrated. Now granted that was not a crazy amount of food, let me assure you there were times that would have been waaayyyyyyy worse. But even with that recent event I think I am making progress. I have found the shift in my thinking goes hand in hand with my physical activity. I really am finding that my emotions are in general stronger, more in check. And now when I am feeling a bit of frustration, anger what ever, I look to get out and run. In this choice I find I think, think about what is under my skin try to come to some understanding whereas mindless eating it just that..mindless and serves not long term purpose. Now, I know there is a danger in replacing the two..food and exercise can both become drugs..but it is not that. It is a balancer...and it works because we need it for all things to function properly. Exercise does make you mentally strong along with physically strong. I know there is science behind that but I am not going try to explain that...um yeah...not that smart. I just dream about being a Sheldon or a Dr. Reed
Now back to loving food..I DO and I don't want to not love and enjoy food. Since weight has been a struggle for so long..food has always been an enemy...thus the abuse of it I guess. Use to be a constant item of thought,,what..how much..etc. When you are always thinking about it, it takes a much bigger place than it should. This too is changing....I feel so much more at peace with food. I don't stress about it, I eat things I love and not feel guilty. The way I eat is changing because my mind is changing..what I want, when and how often I want all seems to sorting itself out. You become more in tune with what you need to feel good , which takes on a different meaning too! Eating "crazy" as I like to call it really does become an occasional thing.
I love and want food to feed my soul. I think that is a lovely thing.
1 comment:
i am very much looking forward to feeding our souls together at la creperia in less than a month. so exciting.
love you.
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